Birthdays in review

Mr. Tobs Turns 1. Wasn't much interested in cake, but LOVED his new truck:


Miss Maddie turns 3, celebrating at what has become an annual dance party. Can you in her expression, "I am a bonafide princess, who takes her role as princess ballerina very, very seriously."

Mom's birthday included an afternoon at the beach followed by a sunset picnic:

Inward, Outward, and Beyond!!!

Introducing Inward, Outward, and Beyond-yond-yond-yond-yond!!! (echo affect). Or, abbreviated, I.O.B, if we need a name that lends itself to teens pitching their new youth ministry to friends..."Yo you check out dat I.O.B...it tight!" Behind the name, I encourage anyone to read Inward Outward Journey by Elizabeth O'Conner. Primarily, to have your paradigm of spiritual formation radically challenged, but I suppose also, if you want to know where we ripped off this name.

After an amazing Summer Internship with teens/ young adults this summer, the question pressed into the minds of our ministry team was, "What now with these young people?" Our much beloved Christine Brinn had gone deep into relationship with a group of girls for the last two years (many of whom participated this summer). Upon transitioning out of her two year internship to Fuller Seminary a few weeks ago, nurturing and intentional as she is, with the help of my lovely wife, she set these teens up with mentors.

But, we all knew, especially after this dynamic summer, that part of being church, is being church together as a larger community. Jesus wants us to catch him INWARD within our own lives and hearts, and within our dynamic webs of relationships. But not to stop their, to find him OUTWARD as this large community encourages, envisions, energizes, and activates us, to discover him once again outside of our corporate life through piggy backing on his work in the world. And to find him BEYOND doing things "we couldn't ask for or imagine."

With the young people God had given us, we knew this meant extending out the experience of our summer into the school year in some sustainable way. Also personally, I knew that it was time to form a community that would allow me to invite students from Hoover, who I know through all my activities there, to find a safe place to explore faith in Jesus. Introducing Inward, Outward, and Beyond!!!!!!

Before we arrived here though...I surely didn't want to go back to being the guy who would "make it happen," as "the youth guy." That guy is someone I admire, someone I can slip into being, but someone who exhausts every introverted fiber of my body. In fact, I don't even think that guy or gal really exists, except among those willing to leg press the facade until it topples on them, like it does everyone else who plays that game. I knew that God had to assemble a team with someone to direct it who had more focused passion than myself.

Enter Kathy Pham! Notice her with the confident youthy peace sign on the right of the picture, with a look on her face like "Peace is so RAD!!! Its what you neeeeed!!! Kathy (tall girl with glasses, black shirt) was amazing as a summer intern this summer. She thought she was merely exploring a call into urban ministry, she ended up falling in love with teens and young adults in our community, and doing such a good job loving them, that our ministry team took notice and then began to petition the Lord to put her in a half nelson and drag her into our community.

Kathy is now raising support for a position as Director of Youth and Young Adults. Oh yes, I will shamelessly ask some of you not only to give to Anastasia and I, but to give to her as well, because she is the real deal. Kathy is from Westminster, the largest Vietnamese community outside of Vietnam in Orange County (an omen for her joining up with a Presbyterian church? I think so...theology nerds only please.) She has found that City Heights feels like home, with a Vietnamese business every 10 ft., yet she trips out like all of us, at how people are mish-mashed together into this strange diversity casserole called City Heights.

Kathy has a background in the corporate world, and therefore moves on everything so efficiently and intentionally, she makes me feel SLOOOOW. Somehow, she has figured out how to incarnate herself into cyber-space, and through the strange power of Facebook knows what teens are thinking before they think it themselves. Kidding aside, her entrepreneurial and gregarious nature make her uniquely fitted to direct our new youth ministry. Interestingly, she happens to have run a tutoring center, which we beforehand had said would be a vital aspect of a ministry intent on loving the whole person, rather than just" saving their soul." Coincidence? I think not.

Enter Adam Mclane. Adam, the white guy with glasses with the "Oh crap, am I really doing this" smirk, was one of those youth guys I was talking about who had the facade topple on him. He works for Youth Specialties as a resource to other burned out youth guys, and as their computer boy genius inventing an array of online tools to help resource youth pastors. He and his family happened to land in our church awhile ago, but if you mentioned doing ministry of some sort, he would bare his teeth like a wary dog, knowing that the kind hand of a stranger can end up with him back on the ministry leash. Thank God Adam is ready to go! He will play an incredible role in teaching, resourcing, and generally helping us to envision a youth ministry that doesn't fall into the same tired paradigms that lend themselves to hollow entertainment-based ministry, that fails to offer the costly but full and compelling invitation to follow Jesus in sacrificial ways.

Enter Erin. My first memory of Erin was of her bailing out of my house in the first days of our church plant, needing some breathing room from the suffocating worship and God-talk that spooked her and challenged her at the same time. Once our token skeptic, she is now living out her new-found faith by taking a risk to with work young people from a world very different from her own. Erin brings authenticity, someone well aware (as we all should be) that she is along the same journey with the young people she will work with. The value of an older person who is not settled and secure in their beliefs, is immense. Young people need to see examples of other seekers being used by God, even though they have not fully "arrived" at rock solid conviction.

Where am I in the picture? Fittingly, I was on my back in bed, after an awkward and humbling procedure which will make Maddie and Toby the only children I will father again (I think.) Isn't it beautiful! Our first youth night, and I, literally and symbolically am out of the picture!!! When I was grinding my teeth, timid about moving forward, because I thought that all of this would somehow fall on me, God said, "Yo Chris, I am going to put you on your back with some awkward soreness, just to let you know that ministry is not about any load you carry my friend." Thanks God, I needed that.

I invite you to pray for us, as we moved forward....

Urban Project Wrap-up

To do the work of ministry, is to involve yourself in undertakings with others that do not lend themselves to; clear, concise, categorized, open and shut, evaluations of "Was this successful?" Believe it or not, you could get two "Christians" in a room to evaluate the same ministry experience, and wonder if both each has a different "Christ" in there "ian." But since, of course, I have a authentic and deeply rooted understanding of the the true "Christ" in my "ian," let me offer some success indicators from the summer.

1) 3 teens were baptized after the Urban Project. I am with those of who get freaked out about environments of religious social control (ever seen Jesus Camp?) that seem to play on the vulnerability, insecurity, and naivety, of young people, in order to indoctrinate them towards "conversion." That aside, I am amazed with how creating a safe, respectful, and sensitive environment for teens exploring faith in Jesus, in which they are told right up front, "We will be learning a lot about who Jesus is through our teaching times, and will connect all of that to what he is about in the world through our service and work in the community," created a catalytic-faith-nurturing atmosphere. I am more convinced than ever that when you put concrete stories and teachings from Jesus, along side experiences of servant leadership and compassion among "the least of these," you will surely encounter him. And, some did, for the very first time.

2) Many people from our church used their resources and gifts to make the Project happen. I am stuck on the idea from Eph. 4 that the PRIMARY role of the minister is to "equip the saints for works of service." I saw this play out NOT through organizing a seminar on "Doing ministry in the Urban Context," but by offering a small opportunity for them to use their gifts, whether they were "ready" or not. Learning by doing is the lost art of an Evangelical church who thinks that discipleship can happen by consuming information. I am truly amazed by the quality of the people in our church!

3) 4 College students won't ever be the same. I know that the four students who played such critical mentoring roles to teens in our group, are now different people. One student, (an ex- Mormon) says that he understands that the Christian faith must be expressed, according to Isaiah 58, both vertically (staying right with God) and horizontally (authentic love for neighbor that expresses itself in works of justice, compassion, and simple kindness) if one desires to truly follow Jesus. Another, who adopted a learning posture throughout the time, and was very relational with teens in the group reflected something like, "I think that ministry is more than just doing nice stuff for people you don't even know, or truly understand, I think is begins by learning to spend time with people first." For those of you who scoff out the lack of profundity of these" a-hah" moments, I ask you to consider how the world might be different if people truly lived into these realizations.

4) The handful of teens who did the Urban Project last year have really grown-up. Sure teens mature, become more "adult," and far less hormonal and quirky. But these teens are really growing up! Whether it be a girl who pursued mentors to receive prayer for the struggles in her life, hidden last year by shyness, isolation, and uncomfortable smiles. Or, one guy who last year was nervous, shy, and without voice, who every other day would engage with me, asking "So Chris, how are you?," or "Chris, tell me about when you started trusting God for the first time?"

5) "Throw away" teens were at the center of God's work in our community. One teen, who struggles through emotional and developmental challenges, was kicked out of his last volunteer position working with children for "being too wild with them." We had our teachable moments with him this year, but in the end, it was the children who were "wild about him,"seen often with children hanging on his back, and another under his extended "Lean on Me" arm.

Thanks all of you who contributed through prayers, giving, and service, to help make Urban Project happen. I am so excited to see how God uses the momentum of this summer to stir up greater transformational work to come.

PRAYER PLEASE!!
I ask you to pray for one pressing area of need. Would you pray that the hundreds of children and families we connected with this summer through the Kids Clubs, and Camp, would be moved by the Spirit of the Lord to connect with a community of faith that will journey with them into the wholeness of Jesus.

San Diego Urban Project 09 Video

A large block of free time

Yesterday, I spent the day with my boyfriend of 16 years. To celebrate Chris' 32nd birthday, Christine and her family sent us away for the day, keeping our kids and treating us to some special indulgences (in our case, food!) We were gone for 10 hours - plenty of time to unwind, talk, read, sip wine, shop, eat, and catch a movie. I felt like we had a whole weekend vacation in one day.

We embarked on a Loop de San Diego County, driving up to Escondido to visit a well-reputed winery. It was our first wine tasting, and we both enjoyed it. Very unpretentious, and very yummy wine. Then, we sat on the grounds, me with my Bibble, Chris for a siesta. A pacific breeze seemed to have found its ways inland, and it was just a gorgeous day. We took a wine-making tour, and then we were off to the coast.

We visited the REI in Encinitas. Chris didn't find anything he liked that was on sale, but I did exchange a year old purse that had a busted zipper thanks to their 100% satisfaction guarantee. So I walked out with a new purse. Nice.

Over in Cardiff, we walked along the bluff overlooking sparkly aquamarine ocean. We got cold in the shade where were sitting, so we walked some more in the sun. Grabbed a coffee and read a little from "More with Less" a Mennonite cookbook, and then ironically went out to eat at a pricey, but really great Italian restaurant. They make their pasta in house (Cat, you would love it!) Finally, we couldn't decide whether to go home, go out for dessert or use movie passes. Chris absolutely wasn't up for my idea of going to see the Sea World night shows with our passes - he gets creeped out by their suspicious propaganda "Believe in Shamu" - their new show touts Shamu can save all and humans and orca are on a quest "to become one". So we went with our tradition of seeing a movie. Julie & Julia was cute, but boring.

We got home, the house was all in order, both kids in bed, and a plate of Bean's famous Snickerdoodles were waiting for us. Thanks, Brinn family for a wonderful day. We love 'Bean so much.

Plentiful Harvest...Plentiful Workers

Camp Rodeo just started this morning. We have five organizations working together to pull this camp off! Harbor Church and World Impact are putting on the camp. (We merged our teams awhile back.) Our summer internship team; comprised mostly of 13 teens from the City Heights community, and four college students from Inter Varsity Christian Fellowship, ran four different Kids Clubs inside apartment courtyards in the community leading up to this camp. From these Clubs we signed up around 60 kids. We also ran a random ice cream outreach outside of an elementary school, where we met parents who signed 30 more kids up for this seemingly random summer camp. Add to that random invitees and children from our Childrens' Church at Harbor... we have over 110 kids at camp today!
Add to the list of organizations Indian Hills Camp who has sent a team of experienced staff down to help us run the camp; providing shirts, supplies, etc. Add to that Morristown Presbyterian Church from Pennsylvania, who sent a short term team of families who are providing lunch, and running crafts. You get a coloborrative mess that is hard to explain to people asking, whose camp is this?
The end result, I have time to ask for your prayers in the middle of camp, because we have all the help we need! And, enough children to keep the help busy! The best part of being on a winning team, is that it makes all the players look better than they really are (yes, the little boy that needs validation still cares about this, you do to if you are honest), with doing half the work they would need to do to "pull an extra load" often required in these large undertakings.
Sure, there are headaches, and confusion, and miscommunication. But, what a sweet picture of the Body of Christ as living organism.
We, Harbor Church, hope that we begin relationships with children and their families that will last through the years. Last year we formed new relationships with a small handful of children and families that have "stuck" throughout the year. We were not satisfied and are looking to follow up with more intention this year.
PRAY! That this would be the begining of many relationships with children and families for whom we hope Harbor, really is a harbor of love and safety from the raging waters of life. For teen counselors who are responsible for small groups of children through out the week. Pray that they will begin to see how; listening, smiling, playing, sharing, forgiving, transform the lives of children. Pray for unity and protection. Camps at public parks are risky in the sense that there are lots of places to wander off, and lots of random people passing through.

Stay tuned for more to come....

Climbing Mountains

This past week, I traveled to a mountain resort town while my hubby ran an intern retreat for Urban Project (our summer youth leadership program). When I got home, he had stories of going deeper with some of the teens. Some confided in him due to desperation at home, others simply because they like and trust him. I always am proud of him for walking mountains with young people, one step at a time, often with nothing special to catch your attention day to day, but then, after time, they reach different peaks together where the view is altered and break through happen, by God's grace. It's such a privilege.

I had the literal opportunity to climb one of Colorado's 14ers this past Monday. I had never done anything like this before. Desert hiking is different than the cold and thin-air of above-the-treeline-hikes. It was awesome! 3.3 tough miles up, and 3.3. loooong miles down. Scott, Michael, Jody and I all made it, at our own paces to the top. There were chipmunk, mountain goat, and marmot sightings.

I highly recommend Colorado vacations, maybe not with 3 babies under the age 3, but even a bit sleep-prived, it was well worth it:

Maddie wading in 40 degree river water.

Lounging in our hotel room.

Lots of wildlife sitings. The goats didn't even take notice of us.

14,285' to the top. A bit sore the next day!

At the bottom of the hike (6.5 hours after we started!)

Urban Project 2009 (Week 1) "Grateful..."

I don't know why, even after years of experience leading summer mission teams, I continue to be surprised that a divergent group of high school and college students gel together relationally so quickly and naturally.

One reason, I think, relational connection has happened, once again in such a way that the gift of relationship seems to precede the building of relationship, is due much in part to a deep sense of gratitude seeping out of almost everyone. This gratitude seems to be fertilizing the relational soil from which the first buds of community are already sprouting.

College students from Inter Varsity are grateful to be playing such a critical mentoring role to inner city teens, perhaps surprised to find them more open to giving and receiving love than they thought. Urban teens are glad to be selected as "leaders," playing a major role in running summer Kids Clubs and the upcoming Camp Rodeo.

Still more, they are simply grateful to be out of the house, and a part of something more meaningful that the psuedo relational worlds of texting, My Space, and Facebook. Worlds they spend hours inside seeking to feel desired and less alone, but in the end still empty, like all addicts after the fix continues to lose the potency it once had. Many are grateful also to be away from "the drama at home" which for more than I am comfortable with, is usually of the senseless and tragic variety, rather than drama of any epic or meaningful sort for which they long.

Personally, I have been in a place of scarcity lately, brought on by disappointment which is in one sense (I think) a form of "holy discontent," and, in another sense, feeling like I am not enough, as one who is prone to withdrawal and blame others for dynamics in which I am part of just the same. (Forgive me for generalities, sometimes they are necessary.)

Thankfully, gratitude is a such a contagious gift. I have "caught it," from teens who are responding to the gracious person of Jesus, grateful to be introducing himself, as one who will help them make sense of a life that is stale at best, plain shit at worst.

I have caught it from college students who wanted to get away from a summer "that would be just about me, making money, having fun," and found what they were looking for through service that serves them.

I am grateful for one teen in particular, who I have coached for the last couple of years at Hoover, who responded to my awkward invitation to be a part of this church thing, "where we won't shove Jesus down your throat." I am grateful that it seems Jesus is shoving himself down his throat, not like a big bad tasting pill, but like a cold glass of lemonade on a hot day in Phoenix.

I am grateful for those of you who pray for our community here, and those who have provided financially to make this happen. More next week....